You know you’re a spoonie when” – List

You know you’re a spoonie when:

  • You own more cushions, pillows and blankets than probably the rest of your street put together.
  • You also can’t help but come back from any shopping trip with at least one fluffy blanket or cushion.
  • Or fluffy socks. So. Many. Fluffy. Socks.
  • You plan leaving the house with more forethought than goes into a military operation.
  • You can recite exactly which cafes and restaurants are suitable for you from memory, whether it is dietary, accessibility, distance to the toilet or anything else.
  • And going to new places you have already found out in advance what is near that matches.
  • Dry shampoo. All the dry shampoo.
  • You know how to read test results, machines, operate equipment,  your relevant medications, better than the person who introduced you to those things.
  • You say words like “spoonie”, “brain fog” and “fatigue! in every day conversation.
  • You might not have remembered to put pants on this morning (reader, I remembered, round of applause please) but you can recite your meds doses and times as needed.
  • You have before held the internal debate between the nutritional benefits of eating vs the symptoms it was cause.
  • You can go for days, sometimes weeks, at a time with interacting with no one besides your doctor.
  • Most of your friends live online.
  • You can disguise how awful you’re feeling. And you do. A lot.
  • You can take strong pain killers as if they were smarties, and look shocked when people are affected by them. Or it’s the other way around. No in between!
  • The majority of your money goes on things that make you life functionally easier, whether that’s audiobooks because you can’t manage to read any more, or more cushions (see point one…) because other bits need supporting, or taxis because you can’t walk. All your money goes on being ill. Bitter? Me? Nah.
  • Bras are highly over rated.
  • So is clothing in general – I’d say “count how many pairs of pajamas you own as a spoonie” but last time I did, I got frightened.
  • You don’t know what you would do without the emotionally support of the people close to you, either physically or in cyber space. Your clan. The ones who keey you going.
  • You have lost many friends through being ill, so those you have are especially dear to you. Though you still hold a secret fear of losing them.
  • You have watched a lot of random documentaries in the middle of the night when awake at ridiculous times.
  • You don’t understand why children fight naps. Naps are a wonderful thing.

Of course this isn’t a complete list, but just a few things…. Anything to add? Let me know in the comments!


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